


Eggsy's Boys

by Renai_chan



Series: Lifeline [3]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: But he ain't no pushover, Eggsy is a spoiled brat, Eggsy is my fandom bicycle, M/M, Misunderstandings, Multi, Unbeta'd, Unwanted Sexual Advances, first draft, might start off a little bit creepy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-12 00:33:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7913485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Renai_chan/pseuds/Renai_chan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eggsy attracts the attention of the wrong people, but he <i>explains</i> in a very visual way why he's off the market.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Eggsy's Boys

**Author's Note:**

> How I imagine Eggsy and the agents:

Eggsy was used to being treated horribly.

He was used to being punched in the gut for the smallest of mistakes, to being pinched on the bum for "having such a cute one," to being manhandled, to being starved because he "didn't bring in enough earnings," to being forced to fuck when he didn't want to. He'd been called all the names in the book: whore, slag, bitch, he's heard them all. Since his mum died when he was twelve, horrible treatment was all he'd known people to give.

Kingsman was such a massive, sudden change from that that for weeks after Harry had brought him there, he was distrustful of the smiling, friendly faces that turned his way. He hid in his room or behind Harry and actively avoided others when he could until slowly he learned that very few people at all were Dean and certainly none of them were at Kingsman.

Even when the knowledge of his... role in the organization had come to be known through whispers among friends at pub crawls and bender nights--no one willing to risk the ire of any agent by outright gossipmongering, nevermind that none of it was in malice--never had Eggsy received horrible treatment because of it.

So to find himself once more staring in the face of it was jarring to the point of incapacitation.

All three were visitors from the US branch, Eggsy knew, because Arthur had mentioned it during the last Round Table meeting. They were IT specialists here to train under Merlin so that they could upgrade their systems back at home and sync with the HQ mainframe.

Having been to Merlin's office a few times in the last eight days they'd been here, he'd extended to them the hospitality he'd come to know at the estate. He greeted them as though they were distant friends, he offered up the facilities available for use, he even offered them a tour of the grounds which they gladly took up.

Which they did because apparently he had an ass "you could bounce a quarter off of."

"I beg your pardon?" he asked, appalled.

"We've unfortunately been denied the pleasure of reaping for ourselves some decent British ass because Merlin decided that training couldn't wait and that we _have_ to stay in the mansion for the remainder of our visit, so we're limited to the choices we have inside the premises," explained the first of the three, Jim, Eggsy remembered.

"Not that you're any second-best, sweetheart, I assure you," said Ed with a smarmy smile that was a poor attempt at seduction.

"I'm sure we can show you a good time, being American and all. You Brits are all repressed and shit, we'd blow your fucking mind," added Stan.

Eggsy blinked at all three of them in disbelief.

I mean... He supposed it was an honest mistake and that they weren't able to put his face to his, well... reputation, but they've been here _a whole week_. Surely, they should have known by now.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline, gentlemen," he said in the snottiest voice he could muster. Admittedly, though, it sounded as bewildered as he felt more than the appalled arrogance he was aiming for.

"Come on, darling," Ed wheedled, leaning in so that Eggsy had to step back. Seeing the retreat, all three of them made an advance until Eggsy was pressed up against the nearest wall. "We'll be gentle, we promise."

Jim reached out to stroke Eggsy's cheek, prompting out of him a choked, "Seriously?"

"Knew you'd come around, babe. Moresomes are so very hard to come by these days, especially in the gay community. Why pass up the chance when it's there?"

Probably because Eggsy could get a 'moresome' at a drop of the hat from far better men than these three stooges.

He narrowed his eyes at them, irritated for a split second because _how dare they_. How dare they assume that any pretty face they encountered would be down to fuck? How dare they act like they owned the world and that everything in it was ripe for their taking? Fucking Americans.

For a moment, he was tempted to show them that you didn't live with twelve agents for four years and not pick up a few tricks. For a moment, he wanted to lay them out and make it _hurt_. 

But the moment passed because he had a better idea.

He pasted on a sultry little grin and curled a hand around Jim's tie, reeling him in the slightest little bit. The he purred in the most lascivious of ways, "I do _adore_ getting all my holes fucked by big... strong... _men_." The three of them exchanged thrilled looks that made Eggsy want to roll his eyes.

Before they could get any ideas though, he said, "Why don't we finish the tour first?" He slipped between them to get a good distance away, winked, and added, "I'm sure you'll enjoy the _climax_." Then he sashayed away without a glance back.

They caught up with him a few steps later, caging him in the middle of their little triangle. Eggsy paid no heed to the skin brushing up against his own or to the palpable _want_ rolling off of them in waves. He was used to unwanted touches after all, so it wasn't a big deal.

He led them to the gym, a popular past time among Kingsman staff, but most especially among the agents, two of whom--Bedivere and Gawain--were quite actively pummeling each other into the mats.

Eggsy allowed the Yanks a moment to watch because agents in full fight mode were a breathtaking sight to behold, all leashed violence and calculated damage. 

Bedivere was the faster fighter, tossing out leaps and spins and lighting-quick jabs, while Gawain was the stronger one, brute force fueling all of his punches. Neither had the clear advantage over the other, but then again, despite what it would seem to those who didn't quite know them, they were holding themselves back. It was training, after all, not a fist fight. The goal was to come out stronger, not bruised and battered when their next mission could come at any time.

They ended with a friendly handshake, and that was when Eggsy made his presence known. "Richard, Kenneth!" he called out, hopping onto the mats with casual ease. Smiles lit up their faces when they caught sight of Eggsy.

"What brings you here?" Kenneth asked while Richard took a swig of his water. 

Now, despite knowing that his reputation was common knowledge around Kingsman, he didn't go actively demonstrating it in front of the other employees. Common decency, you know? No PDA in common areas and all that.

But this time, he believed, it was rightly warranted.

He pushed himself up onto his tiptoes and reached for the back of Gawain's neck to pull him down into a sweaty, downright filthy kiss. When Gawain started to pull back in confusion, he only held tighter and pulled out all of his best moves so that the agent would stay where he was and kiss back in return, all sex and filth until Eggsy was nearly bent backwards.

Both Bedivere's eyebrows were raised at him in question when they parted, but Eggsy only grinned and threw both arms around his neck to offer him the same treatment.

"Not that that wasn't a pleasant surprise, but what excatly was that for?" Gawain asked.

Eggsy's smile was broad and bright. "Just because I fucking love watching you fight," he offered as an explanation. 

Bedivere snorted in disbelief, but ultimately dropped it. That was when he caught sight of the Yanks gaping at them.

"Oh, hello," he greeted.

"They're the boys from the States," Eggsy explained. "I was just showing them around, which I better get back to." He kissed them on a cheek each before bounding back over to the three and asking almost smugly, "Shall we?"

"You--" Ed started to say.

Eggsy ignored him and said brightly, "The pool next, I think. Everyone loves swimming. I'm sure you'll find it entertaining during your rare downtimes."

"We should--"

"'S just round this bend 'ere, aaaaaaaaaand here it is!" Kingsman had three different pools: an outdoor, an indoor, and an indoor diving, but hardly anyone used the outdoor one, not when it was always fucking freezing. Inside, Eggsy found another of his boys. "You met Agents Bedivere and Gawain. Over there is Agent Caradoc. Gerard!" Caradoc halted his lap to find Eggsy waving at him--rather violently, really. Eggsy was hoping he would pseudo-accidentally slap one of the Yanks. 

Gerard obediently swam over and hauled himself out of the pool, all glistening, muscled glory, and Eggsy made his appreciation _very_ known by reaching out for him and splaying a hand on his gorgeously muscled abs.

"Hello, darling," Caradoc greeted, bending over to drop a kiss on his cheek. "Are these the American visitors Arthur's been telling us about?" Eggsy hummed in agreement.

"Yeah," he answered dimissively and then drew Caradoc close to him by the garter of his trunks. "You haven't come to see me in a while," he said with an overdone pout. "I might start to think you don't want me no more."

Caradoc tipped his chin up and stroked his cheek. "You know that's not possible. How can anybody not want you, lovely boy?" He kissed Eggsy's cheek again. "Why don't I come see you tonight, darling. I know Galahad's out, maybe I can get a word in edgewise this time." 

Eggsy laughed. "I can always shut 'im up if that's what's keeping you from seein' me."

"Mmm," Caradoc murmured noncommittally as he wrapped both arms around Eggsy's waist and bent over to kiss his mouth. "I much prefer to see _you_ gagged."

"That can be arranged," Eggsy answered against his lips.

"Uh... We should--I think we--" Stan hesitantly interrupted.

"Oh, right," Eggsy said, pulling away from Caradoc in surprise. "Duty calls, love, but I'll leave my bedroom unlocked fer you tonight, yeah?" Then he winked outrageously.

Jim stuttered, "No, it's fine... We... We should get back to Tech, Merlin's got some stuff planned for us and--"

"Oh, all right, all right. Hold yer horses," Eggsy cut in with a put-upon sigh. "C'mon, then. Let me get you back to the lab."

Their walk back made Eggsy feel giddy in that their stares were moderately fearful. He could feel them arguing silently behind him, possibly blaming each other over making eyes with the boyfriend of an agent-- _several_ agents, as far as they could tell. Good. Maybe next time, they'd keep their fucking hands to themselves and not be _complete_ douchebags.

"We're here!" he declared when the doors slid open to reveal the tech wing. Various handlers and techies greeted him amiably, but almost equally absently because he was a common enough sight down here. "Now, Merlin you said 'ad stuff fer you to do. C'mon." He jerked his head in the direction of Merlin's office, ignoring their attempts to wave his help away. "Nonsense. Merlin's got _plenty_ a' time to help you out," he said, not without sarcasm in his voice. 

When he swung the door open, Merlin's head came up to see who had invaded his space. His eyes narrowed at the three Yanks, but Eggsy grinned broadly. "The boys said you had stuff fer 'em to do? Thought I'd bring them over personally," he said as he crossed the room. 

And then he slid himself neatly into Merlin's lap, relieved him of his glasses, and quite proprietarily sucked his soul out through his mouth.

He suppressed Merlin's questioning noise with a generous roll of his hips and tongue fucked him like they didn't have an audience of three, and when he was done, he perched Merlin's glasses back on his nose, kissed the tip of it, and slunk back off of his lap, ignoring Merlin's narrow-eyed, knowing look. 

"See you later, babe," he said from across the room where the three Americans were looking more and more like they wanted to curl up and die.

When he turned to them, he smiled sweetly, patted their shoulders and said, "Lovely havin' a look about wiv you, gents. Hope you enjoyed the show." Then he quietly added, "And maybe next time, you'll tread a little bit more carefully lest you accidentally hit on the Round Table's favorite boy."


End file.
